Oh, the joy … oh, the agony. It’s been a rollercoaster of emotions in the Yooro 2012 table football tournament these past few days.
Yet there’s no one more delighted in all of Daftown this weekend than Coy Hudson after his Ingerland outfit chalked up their first win, mashing the Swedes in a rip-roaring 10-7 win.
On a night of highs, lows and a few drinks too (truth be told), national treasures Wally Theocott, Donny Bellwhack and Sandy Barrel were among the scorers as Hudson’s heroes finally hit form.
There were fine showings from Joseph ‘Harry’ Hearty, John Glenson, Jolene Waistcoat, Skip Parka and Gerry Stevens too, with not so much as a ponytail or a nautical Scandinavian beard able to spoil the party.
And there are bound to be a few more sleepless nights for Coy as he works out just who should make way for returning star turn Shrek Looney in Tuesday’s decider against Ukraine.
There was drama ahoy at The New Table of Dreams during the latest batches of matches, more than matching the histrionics of the alternative competition currently taking place in Poland and Ukraine.
And I can reveal a split of results across the nations, ensuring plenty more sudden death tussles these next few days as we head towards the last eight.
Last time you heard, we’d just completed the first of the second round of matches in the group stage, all four Group A nations with one win to their name.
Since then, it’s been a similar tale elsewhere – with only Germany and France unbeaten after two matches, and Portugal and Ukraine yet to pick up a win.
The mighty Hoyerland – the night before Ingerland – overcame the odds to secure their first win too, their action-packed 10-7 Group C win over a sparkling Spain side causing more than a few raised eyebrows.
It proved a night to remember for the Oirish camp as Stray ‘Cat’ Gideon held his nerve at one end while Bobby Keynote shone at the other against Vince Del Busker’s favourites.
The celebrations that followed were the stuff of which legend is made, and at one point Daftown TV summariser and ex-Eire legend Rory ‘No Relation’ Keynote threatened to turn his dogs on the partying fans if they didn’t shut the Robert Fleck up and let him speak.
That was just one of many thrillers that have rocked Daftown’s premier sporting venue so far, and – from where we last left off – we also saw Denmark’s 10-4 demolition of Portugal, Ron Aldi and co. left impotent by a sizzling Danish outfit.
That was followed by a Mittwoch meisterklass from Fabi Pigherder and Supermario Gomez as the Germans saw off the Netherlands 10-4, as good as ensuring a quarter-final for David Gedge impersonator Joachim Lowenbrau’s side.
That result followed a 10-6 victory for the Eyetalians against Croatia, ensuring we have another group in which all four sides have one win to their names – setting up a mouth-watering Monday night showdown.
Meanwhile, Laurent Blancmange’s French fancies fought their way to a thrilling Friday night 10-4 Group D victory over Ukraine, the roof firmly closed to protect the New Table of Dreams as the heavens truly opened in ever-precipitous Lankyshire.
Then came Coy Hudson’s moment of joy, our first guest of the tournament – The Wheelers – playing a crucial part in both Friday matches and now able to tell future generations ‘we were there’.
I can also exclusively reveal another fateful factor in that Ingerland win, our house guests on the night also having been there when Ingerland strike heroes Barrel and Bellwhack found their feet at club level – on loan at local table football legends Depreston South End.
And now we’re beautifully set up for the last round of group matches, with our eight quarter-finalists to be confirmed these coming four days.
Bet you can’t wait.
Results so far: Group A – Poland 10 Greece 6; Russia 7 Czech Republic 10; Greece 10 Czech Republic 4; Poland 5 Russia 10. Group B – Holland 10 Denmark 8; Germany 10 Portugal 5; Denmark 10 Portugal 4; Netherlands 4 Germany 10. Group C – Spain 10 Italy 4; Ireland 9 Croatia 10; Italy 10 Croatia 6; Spain 7 Ireland 10. Group D – France 10 England 8; Ukraine 8 Sweden 10; Ukraine 4 France 10; Sweden 7 England 10.
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